An Inherent Need For Women is Security
What if instead of teaching a woman how to be independent, she’s taught what a dependable man looks like? The soft, surrendered feminine, resting in the security of knowing that she’s provided for.
God never intended for women to be left to fend for themselves.
God created Eve for Adam. Woman was not created to be left to fend for herself, but rather to be a helper. Woman was not created alone but from the rib of man. Look at Mary, Mother of God, the prototype of womanhood. The Holy Spirit overshadowed Her, and She conceived Jesus. Mary generated God from God, and yet Joseph was still given to Her by God to be Her earthly husband, Her security.
Self-sufficiency and help-mate are two different things. The fall of mankind was Eve taking things into her own hands, “self-sufficiency” - disobeying God’s command. Due to the fall, sin entered the world. Sin disrupts the harmony of proper order. Unfortunately, this means fatherlessness, divorce, widows, and a whole lot of brokenness due to sin and death entering into the world. If we aren’t sick with our own sin, we’re sick with the sin done unto us by others.
Today, women are thrown out from under their father's roofs at eighteen, and left to fend for themselves, in order to be "independent" and "self-sufficient." Not only is this ground for young women to fall into deep sin, loss of faith, and trouble; (“Dynamic Catholic states that 85% of Catholic young adults stop practicing their Faith in college - most of them within their first year of leaving home.” -catholicexchange.com) 86% of all abortions come from unmarried women. This is contrary to true feminine nature, which is dependent, receptive, and soft.
Society is breeding wounded women who become hyper-independent and adapt masculine traits to function under “self-survival” mode due to a sense of security being lost. This translates into a wounded feminine not knowing how to submit/surrender, and the concept itself being foreign.
Fatherlessness and broken families largely play a role in women’s sense of security being lost. Hyper independence happens, when the natural feminine desire to be provided for is wounded, and her sense of security, (which as a little girl comes from a providing father) is not given to her. If she’s not thrown out from under her father’s roof, the stability of being under one was taken from her.
The wounded feminine thinks submission to a man is ridiculous. This is because her sense of security from a man (her father) that cultivates submission, was stolen from her. Therefore the wounded feminine protests the concept of submission to a husband, because the first man she loves (her father) did not provide the sense of security that women need to submit.
Women will submit to being under the authority of a male boss at work but reject the notion of submitting to a husband. As previously stated, the wounded feminine’s idea of relational submission gets broken due to her sense of security from her father being lost. Since the wounded feminine was forced to be in “survival mode” and provide for herself, submission to a male boss, who rewards her with fuel for survival mode (money, raise, promotion) is deemed as providing that sense of security, that she lacked from her father. Therefore in the wounded woman’s eyes, submission to a male authority in the workforce is deemed acceptable, but relational submission is not.
Femininity doesn’t thrive under conditions, that don’t allow the feminine heart to flow in her soft surrender and receptivity. Survival mode is not thriving. Life in abundance is not “I just have to get through this day.”
The Disposition of The Healed Woman
Every child has a God-given right to have their father and their mother in a holy, healthy, beautiful marriage. For a child to not be given a healthy home is a wound against the proper order of how God intends things to be.
Many put up protective barriers to continue to live in a state of survival mode. Healing can only happen when one acknowledges that there is a wound that needs to be healed.
Living in this survival mode and brokenness can seem to the wounded heart to be more comfortable than newfound freedom without the pain. It takes vulnerability to come to terms with the fact that you have experienced brokenness, and vulnerability can be scary. On the other side of admitting the truth, and allowing yourself to grieve that brokenness, comes restoration and healing. The only way to the Resurrection is through the Cross. The Good News is that the story doesn’t end in sin and brokenness but in Resurrection, restoration, wholeness, and pure undefiled love.
Christ can only heal that which we give Him access to because He respects our free will. True love is freely given and freely received. There’s no man more respectful than Christ The Lord.
The way to stop the wound of loss of security in women is by having strong, healthy, holy, Catholic marriages that follow proper order, with the husband as the head, and provider, and the wife as the heart and nurturer. Catholic families that allow their son's masculinity to thrive and their daughter's femininity to be protected.
What if instead of teaching a woman how to be independent, she’s taught what a dependable man looks like? The soft, surrendered feminine, resting in the security of knowing that she’s provided for.
The question is how can a woman maintain femininity in a broken, sinful world that has forced her into a “provider role?” Maintaining feminine virtue largely comes from looking to God as the Ultimate Provider, He who says He will be a Father to the fatherless and protector of widows. The tender Lord is a lover, who lays down His life for His Bride. God never abandons, though mere mortals may fail us. As a woman, submission to Christ is the key to unlocking true feminine virtue.
“Father of the fatherless, defender of widows— God in His holy abode, God gives a home to the forsaken.” - Psalm 68:5
“When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.” - Psalm 27:10
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name: for you are Mine.” - Isaiah 43:1
Serviam
March 9th is The Feast Day of Saint Frances of Rome, patron of widows.
“A married woman must, when called upon, quit her devotions to God at the altar to find Him in her household affairs.” - Saint Frances of Rome